Sunday, March 5, 2017

Your check engine comes on in your brain...

I have bi-polar, panic and anxiety disorder. Fun times I know. I was diagnosed in April of 1995. Sometimes, the check engine light in my brain comes on. What the heck do I do?

It will be 22 years in April since my suicide attempt. Still can't believe it's been that long. Am I still suicidal? No. Do I have thoughts of suicide that crosses my mind. All the time. Huge difference is, I don't plan on dying by suicide. This world hasn't seen enough of me yet. But what I do find is that the thoughts are there, a lot. Just thoughts, but still a major part of my mental health.

When I became part of the Crisis Text Line back in 2013, it was so exciting to see this service. This technology that is basically tapping into the matrix of those who struggle. I guess a different way of putting it is, a jumper cable to a car battery. When the battery doesn't have enough juice, you give it a boost with the cables. Crisis Text Line has become that boost to so many. 

Many of us who struggle with mental health have our own plans of actions. Therapist, meds, doctors and coping skills. That's like required maintenance for your car right? A tune up.  What I never realized way back when I attempted, is that I needed to always have my jumper cables available too. My current jumper cables are my close friends and family, who know when I'm sheltering away and being that hermit crab. They reach out and basically shock me back to life. 

We see so many people come to Crisis Text Line. From all kinds of issues; from anxiety, stress and relationship issues to name a few. When you have a crisis, it's so intense you freeze and don't know what to do. That's when you reach out and get your jumper cables.

The irony of all this auto talk and car analogy is I have no clue about cars. But I do know when my brain is on the fritz, it's always good to have a healthy maintenance plan in place.

If you are in crisis and need support text Hello to 741741, we have trained Crisis Counselors waiting to listen, 24/7

Learn more about Crisis Text Line and our Crisis Trends data by going to the website: and

Random factoid about me: I was born in a 1970 Dodge Demon on Woodward Ave in Pontiac, MI.
Great start to my life!

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