Monday, April 3, 2017

Being an empath sucks

em·pa·thy
ˈempəTHē/
noun
  1. the ability to understand and share the feelings of another.


Two recent deaths have shaken my world. Amy Bleuel, the founder of Project Semicolon, had died by suicide. Then I learn of of my friend Mandie Wallinger, passed away suddenly last week. 

Though I didn't know Amy personally, her mission and voice has changed so many lives. Her passion and compassion will never be forgotten. Her death has many in the suicide prevention world, devastated. She lost her battle but will always be a staple in the space. 

Mandie was the VERY first person to reach out to me, when I took my first overnight shift at the Crisis Text Line. December 1st, 2013. I was working at Common Ground at the time and my friend Jonny Aguis and I went into the crisis room to start our 11pm-7am shift. Mandie immediately reached out via Direct Message to greet us. Every overnight shift, I enjoyed her humanity and love for the others on the shifts. At the time, it was just Crisis Centers taking convos from varies centers around the country. Mandie was with Samaritans of Boston. I remember listening to her passion for med school and how hard she worked to get in. In March, 2014, I helped develop the remote volunteer program and training. Mandie became a supervisor to some of the remotes. She always was doing trivia during her shift and making the Crisis Counselors engage with one another. She was a staple on the overnight shifts. Once the centers were weaned out the crisis centers at Crisis Text Line, I remained friends with Mandie and was able to watch her hilarious antics and passion via Facebook.

This sadness has engulfed my body the last few days. I think of all the good these two people have given in the world. I feel all the sadness. Being an empath I feel things at such greater height it can knock me out of commission for a few days, just so I can regroup, refresh, remain.

My heart goes out to their families and friends. There are no words I can say that will express the true emptiness in my heart.

This blog is dedicated to both of them. I promise to them and all those they have changed that I will be a source of good. I will continue to help, provide support and speak for them. Because I know that they will not be forgotten.

RIP Amy and Mandie. I will continue to share your stories.

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